Right before I walked in to have my third c-section and my third baby girl, I was the most anxious I’ve ever been in my life!
I was begging them to knock me out.
Not only was the fear of another surgery while awake freaking me out, but the thought of having another baby (when I thought we were DONE) was making me want to hurl!
My kids were just starting to get independent, and the thought of starting over was terrifying. Add to that, the bright lights, 7 people you’ve never met all standing over you poking and prodding and the fact that your arms are pinned down like Jesus on the cross, the experience really is a mind-fuck.
Somehow I made it through (only puking twice) and they pulled out the most perfect little doll baby I’d ever seen. I felt this instant calm wash over me and was overcome with joy.
I never really experienced that with my other two births. The first time I had such a long scary labor that by the time I had my emergency C-section, I barely knew what was going on. The second time, I walked in for a scheduled c-section, but was so drugged up when they pulled her out, I barely remember the birth.
This time was different. I instantly fell in love and knew that everything was going to be ok. And it has been!
Don’t get me wrong, having a baby just shy of your 39th birthday, with 2 other kids and multiple businesses to run, isn’t easy, but something about the last baby just puts everything into perspective and makes you appreciate it all more.
I find myself snuggling her a little more, knowing she’s my last. I stare at her a little longer, memorizing the features of her little face, knowing how quickly they change. I find it much easier to say No to other things that just aren’t important to me anymore. I am really appreciating every coo and caw more than I ever did before.
This time, I’m not trying to rush her to the next “first,” but to fully enjoy each one.
This time, I am older, wiser and more calm because this isn’t my first rodeo.
This time, I appreciate every moment.
I’m also loving what Cece has done for us as a family. (Yes, we finally picked a name, Cecelia). Instead of being jealous, the older girls are obsessed with their little sister. My husband and have truly become a team and his support while healing from my surgery, was more than I ever could have imagined. I had a horrible reaction to the glue that was used and blistered really bad. He literally waited on me hand and foot, and took care of all the kids, so I could heal.
The third child can either make or break you. I believe that we are stronger then ever. Our family is now complete.
Boxed Wine and Bedwetters 